


Come Back To Me

by iamarevenger



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Drama, Angst and Feels, Angst and Tragedy, Angst with a Happy Ending, Awesome James "Rhodey" Rhodes, Baby Peter Parker, Bucky Barnes & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson Friendship, Bucky Barnes & Tony Stark Friendship, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Domestic Fluff, Established Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Eventual Happy Ending, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark Friendship, Kid Fic, M/M, Married Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanov Is Not A Robot, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Protective Steve Rogers, Sad with a Happy Ending, Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Sam Wilson Needs a Hug, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Steve Rogers & Sam Wilson Friendship, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-08-10 04:01:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20129014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamarevenger/pseuds/iamarevenger
Summary: “We lost him Bucky, we don’t know where he is, but they say he’s gone. I’m so sorry I tried, Im so sorry-”.For the first time in his life Bucky Barnes had lost all hope, Steve… He turned his head into Sam’s chest and sobbed loudly as he felt his heart break more and more with every passing second.Steve was gone.---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Steve and Bucky are married with their son Peter and Steve is in the army. But what happens when Steve is lost in action and presumed dead? Will Steve come back to Bucky and Peter or have they lost him?





	1. I Just Need You Now

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! 
> 
> This is my first Multi-chapter Stucky fic so I hope you enjoy it. It is also the first fic I have ever written that has so much angst and sadness so be prepared, this is not for the weak hearted and has a lot of tears and may make you cry if you're anything like me since I cried whilst writing it. 
> 
> I can't promise when I will update but I will try to update this as frequently as possible because I am passionate about this story line! 
> 
> My Twitter is @imarevenger if you want to bully me for updates or just have a chat feel free to contact me there.
> 
> Now I hope you enjoy the first chapter of 'Come Back to Me'.

It was the crying, no the _shrieking _that woke Bucky from his what felt like a minute-long nap. With a deep sigh he got out of his cold bed and padded barefoot out of his room, dragging his fingers through his long hair. The door next to his room was ajar and he slipped in, making soothing noises as he lifted up his little bundle of joy with a small smile.

“Hey there champ, it’s okay, it’s okay Papa is here now.”

Whimpering and trembling in his arms his son pressed his face against Bucky’s neck, the soothing scent of motor oil from his job filling the little boy’s nose. Daddy’s lingering scent was also present on the hoodie Papa was wearing which helped him calm down quicker. Bucky rubbed his hand up and down his back as he made shushing noises against his ear. Peter loved being held tightly after waking up at night and if Steve had sent his clothes with Sam when he came for a visit then that was a blessing in disguise. The boy hadn’t met his father after the singular day they had together when he was born but thankfully the pair had gotten some skin to skin contact. It is as though Peter had remembered Steve’s scent and now it was a sure-fire way to get him to calm down, again a blessing for Bucky when the boy was fussy.

The six-month-old boy stared up at Bucky with big brown eyes, the only physical attribute he had gotten from his mother. Peter had Steve’s blonde hair which would undoubtedly turn brown as he grew older, Bucky’s ‘murder glare’ and Steve’s sweet smile. Peter clutched at Bucky’s hanging hair gently after Bucky had patiently explained how grabbing it hard could hurt Papa and to Bucky’s obvious delight decided to chew on it.

The joys of having a baby are plentiful. Clearly.

All Bucky could do was fondly sigh as his son began to relax and droop, the rocking motion paired with the soft humming of ‘you are my sunshine’ under his breath sending him to dream land. Still humming he gently set Peter down onto his Winnie the Pooh sheets in the cot, with a last once over he quietly walked out of the room. He felt bone tired as he collapsed onto his own bed again, tears springing in his own eyes at just how exhausted he is, but he couldn’t cry. Bucky had to stay strong for Peter and for Steve.

Looking over at one of the bedroom walls he smiled a teary smile at the picture of him and Steve on their wedding day. There had been tears then too but those were to be expected, their love story had been years in the making. Who would have known that the tall man who took the last Lucky Charms box at the supermarket would end up as his husband? Definitely not Bucky if he remembered how much _hell _he had given the stranger at using his height to his advantage and depriving Bucky of the sweet cereal. Steve was of course a gentleman and gave Bucky the cereal as long as he promised to go out for dinner with him.

It was at dinner that Bucky found out Steve was planning on taking the Lucky Charms on deployment because it was his favourite cereal, he was leaving on deployment in two weeks. Of course Bucky was the one who brought his cereal to the airport, along with a sweet love declaration that had Steve crying and also had everyone around them misty eyed. Two weeks-worth of dates had proved Steve Rogers to be worth all of the pain that long distance relationships inflicted. The crippling fear of losing Steve on the battlefield was enough to bring Bucky to his knees on some nights but then he would see his husbands smiling face on Skype and all of it was worth it.

Bucky would go through all of the pain in the world to be with Steve, they had that soulmate type of love that made everything worth it. But sometimes on long nights like this where Peter was fussy, his head was pounding, and he wished he had someone to help shoulder the responsibility it felt like too much. He just wanted Steve to kiss his forehead and settle Peter down, bounce their son in his arms and hear both of their laughs through the wall. Steve had already missed Peter’s first smile, his first word (“Daddy”), his first step and Bucky feared how many more firsts Steve would miss. He had promised Bucky that this would be his last tour and then he would look for a boring office job with Sam so that Bucky could have some peace of mind.

A boring life would be a dream, maybe then he wouldn’t seize up with fear every time the doorbell rang.

He still remembered his husband leaving them six months ago, Peter barely a few hours old as Steve clung to him, not wanting to leave for the airport.

_“Do I really have to go? He’s here and he’s so perfect Bucky, please don’t make me go.” Steve’s lower lip trembled as he clung to his son, they had named him Peter after a friend Steve had lost in combat. Bucky inhaled a deep breath and reminded himself to be strong as he looked into his husband’s watery sky-blue eyes. _

** **

_‘He can’t be brave right now, so I need to be brave for the three of us.’_

_He reached his hand up and rubbed Steve’s stubbly cheek, pressing soft kisses to his husband’s forehead as he cried over their son. Bucky’s voice came out strained as he struggled to hold back his emotions after seeing Steve so devastated, his husband always cried easily when emotional, but this wasn’t happy tears. If Bucky wasn’t positive that Steve would never hurt their son he would fear the tight grip he had on the new-born. But this was Steve. He would rather walk across burning rocks than hurt their baby even if it was accidental. _

_“Baby, can you look at me?”_

_Steve looked up at his husband and another round of fresh tears fell, gently pressing Peter against his hard pecs so that he could hear his daddy’s heartbeat when he started fussing. Bucky tutted sadly and wiped away Steve’s tears, a tight smile across his lips as he whispered softly._

_“This is your last tour you can’t pull out now, honey.” _

_Steve opened his mouth to object, but Bucky shut him up with a look that meant he wasn’t finished. The harsh look softened as he looked down at their baby and sighed softly, tears falling down his cheeks now. _

_“He will still be here Steve, I’ll still be here. I promise we will be right here waiting for you.”_

_Steve shuffled forward to press his knees right against his husband’s, a soft whimper leaving his lips as the next words left his mouth making Bucky’s blood run cold._

_“But what if I’m not? What if I don’t make it back, Buck?”_

_He shook his head as Steve started sobbing, the fear of losing his husband and Peter never seeing his Daddy again feeling all too real. Bucky’s hand clung to Steve’s shoulder, not knowing what to say to quell the fear, how could he? He had that fear too. When they were married it was different. Bucky was alone then but now they had Peter. Little Peter who deserved to have both of his dads, who should never have to spend father’s day at the military graveyard asking questions about his daddy who should be there with him. _

_Closing his eyes Bucky grounded himself, his husband quivering against him with their son comfortably pressed between them. Steve had to come back to them, when Bucky had expressed this fear before Steve had no clue what to say but then Bucky came out with something that made it easier. Bucky’s eyes opened as he realised what he should say to make this slightly better._

_“Remember what you had said to me before your second deployment? After we hit one year of dating and I didn’t want to let you go?” Steve shook his head against Bucky’s shoulder and Bucky ran his fingers through his soft hair. “You said, ‘Buck, I have to do this. I’m doing this to not only keep the rest of our country safe but to keep **you **safe. I enlisted in the army because I had no meaning to my life but now I do. And I need to do whatever I possibly can to keep that meaning safe.’ Remember that, Stevie?” _

_The man in question nodded and sniffled as he lifted his head, looking utterly defeated as he pressed a soft kiss to Peter’s head. Bucky bit his lower lip as his eyes filled with tears again, goodbyes were always so hard. _

_“Then when I asked how I knew it was going to be okay you said ‘nothing could stop me from coming back to you, baby. Nothin on this Earth could stop me from coming home to you.’ And when you said that I knew everything would be okay because you’re the most stubborn man I have ever met.” Bucky choked back a laugh as he rubbed Steve’s cheek again. “Nothing could stop you from coming back to me because I was what gave you meaning. Well now you have Peter too, Stevie. You’re fighting to keep him safe from all of the horrible people who could hurt him. And once you’re done both Peter and I know that nothing, absolutely **nothin **on this Earth could keep you away from us.”_

_The Brooklyn accent came out stronger with his emotional pep talk and his shoulders drooped slightly, Steve lifting himself up higher, sitting a little straighter with a new determined glint in his eyes. He wiped his own tears away and stood from his seat, kissing all over Peter’s little face and whispering a message to him that was so quiet Bucky couldn’t hear it. Steve then handed Peter over to Bucky and cupped his husbands jaw._

_He placed a searing kiss on Bucky’s lips, pulling back only after they needed to take a breath and then pressed his forehead against the man he loves. “I will always come back to you both, as long as my heart is beating it will be fighting to come home to you.” Steve spoke with such conviction and certainty that Bucky let his heart quell, only whimpering out one word before his husband had to leave._

_“Promise?”_

_“With everything I have.”_

Steve had managed to keep that promise for the past 6 months, whenever they skyped he was perhaps battered and bruised but he was _alive _and to Bucky that was a huge win. Peter always batted at the screen whenever he saw Steve and couldn’t stop laughing or smiling which was enough to make Bucky and Steve cry every time. But it was only two more months and then Steve would come back to them. He would be back and would never leave again. And that would be the day that Bucky would finally relax.

He was pulled from his thoughts by a knock on the door, Bucky frowned, and his brows furrowed as it was nearing midnight and none of his friends nor family would come at this time without calling or texting first. With a stomach filled with nerves he walked to his front door and opened it to see Sam Wilson, Steve’s best friend both in arms and off the battlefield looking at him with a wrecked expression. Beside him stood Natasha Romanov, someone Steve had become close to during their tours and Bucky often sent her care parcels along with Sam’s and Steve’s.

“Sam? Nat? What?”

His brain couldn’t form words as Sam’s eyes filled with tears and Natasha looked down at the floor, the usually expressionless woman sniffling. Bucky felt as though his heart had stopped beating as he clenched his fists, shaking his head as the next words left Sam’s lips and he fell to the ground screaming. Tears streamed down his face and he heard Peter wail behind him, Natasha running to his room to get him as Sam bent down to grab Bucky, holding him against his chest as he sobbed into Bucky’s hair.

“We lost him Bucky, we don’t know where he is, but they say he’s gone. I’m so sorry I tried, I'm so sorry-”.

For the first time in his life Bucky Barnes had lost all hope, Steve… He turned his head into Sam’s chest and sobbed loudly as he felt his heart break more and more with every passing second.

_Steve was gone._


	2. I'm Not Giving Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky is in despair and so is Sam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!!
> 
> I'm sorry, I know it has been a while but believe me I have been thinking of this story and what I can do with it. I have a faint idea of what i am going to do with it but nothing concrete just yet. Feel free to comment any ideas you may have of where to take this!
> 
> As always, my Twitter is @imarevenger so feel free to get in touch and fangirl away!
> 
> I hope you enjoy Chapter 2 of Come Back to Me

“Bucky? Bud, it’s been three days.”

Three days since he found out his husband is gone.

“Peter is asking about his Papa.”

He will ask about his daddy soon too and what will Bucky say? He closes his eyes wearily and curls up against Steve’s pillow that barely smells like him anymore. It won’t smell like him again either because Steve is gone.

“You gotta eat Bucky, please.”

Sam had been at his door a lot these past few days. Bucky thinks he feels guilty, but it isn’t his fault. He told Bucky that Steve demanded that everyone leave and that he was right behind them and he was, until he wasn’t.

See the thing is that Bucky had inwardly been preparing for this. It comes with being an army husband, you prepare for the worst and always hope for the best. Every night when he put Peter to bed he stayed up and wrote letters to Steve, of course they Skyped but letters held more meaning. He wrote a letter yesterday.

He couldn’t finish it because it hit him halfway through that Steve would never read it.

How could he write a letter to his probably dead husband? How could he possibly eat and sleep and do all of the things he did before when his world is so much different now? Bucky heard a sigh from behind the door and then Sam’s voice, hoarse and choked like it had been ever since he arrived.

Sam leaned against the door from the outside, his forehead pressing against the hard wood as he inhaled a deep breath. He lifted his hand to knock again and cleared his throat so that he wouldn’t sound as wrecked as he felt.

“I miss him too y’know? He’s the best thing that ever happened to me, protected me and kept me sane and Bucky? I’m just so sorry that I couldn’t protect him well enough. I’m so sorry that I failed you and didn’t protect our boy I’m- “.

His sentence broke off as he fell to the floor, overcome with emotion and sobbing. His hands cupped his face as his body shook and Sam couldn’t hold the tears in anymore, he failed his brother in arms and his brother on the outside. If Steve was dead then it was on him.

_“You’ve got your ‘Bucky’ smile on your face, what is it now?” _

_Steve turned to face his best friend with a confused pout, tilting his head as Sam sat down beside him and laughed. _

_“I don’t have a ‘Bucky’ smile it was just my normal smile.”_

_“Yeah and I don’t have ‘fuck me’ cologne and just use normal cologne when I’m going to a club.”_

_Steve rolled his eyes and gave Sam a cheeky smirk, elbowing his side softly and spoke with glee, his face looking very punchable to Sam at that moment. _

_“Well now that you have Riley the cologne is useless since he hates the smell of it.”_

_“I don’t **have **Riley! We’ve been on four dates Rogers, quit the wedding planning and save that for you and Buckaroo.”_

_Steve paused and didn’t give a smartass response, sitting back with a fond smile on his face and shook his head as he mumbled softly. “I just might.”_

_Sam’s head shot up and his eyes widened so much Steve thought the man was having an aneurysm, only Sam Wilson would die from hearing his best friend is going to propose in an active warzone. Steve bit his lower lip as nerves overcame him. Was this not a good idea? Was Bucky going to say no? Was Sam shocked because they weren’t ready?_

_“I can’t believe you’re finally doing what makes you happy without being prompted first.” Sam shook his head in a daze and his voice took on a mocking tone as he spoke. “I mean it only took you a year and a half of dating to realise there’s no other person on this planet who would put up with you as well as Barnes. Or should I say Rogers 2.0?” _

_Steve groaned and punched Sam’s chest, the latter letting out a wince of pain as he laughed. _

_“Bucky is the only guy who puts up with his partner having an annoying as shit best friend like you as well.” Steve huffs a laugh at Sam’s annoyance and then he mellows out, cracking his knuckles and focusing on the ground. “Are you sure it’s the right move? What if he says no? W hat if he doesn’t want me as a husband?”_

_Huffing again in annoyance Sam shook his head, patting Steve’s arm comfortingly as his lips twisted into a wry smile._

_“Bucky loves you Cap. Heck even an insufferable bastard like me can see just how strong the love between the two of you is. You’re right, no one but Bucky would put up with you having an annoying best friend like me who is awful to him. But just saying he starts it!” Steve laughs softly at that and shakes his head and Sam softens. “He knew about the risks with dating someone so active in the army yet is still adamant that you deserve what the two of you have. He is willing to be the stability that you need and in return you are willing to give him the love he deserves. Fair bargain if you ask me.”_

_With his bottom lip stuck between his teeth Steve still looks like he is in deep turmoil, Sam sighs. It can never be simple can it? _

_“Go on, what’s eating you?”_

_“What if I don’t make it back to him, Sam? You know the dangers of our job and…” Steve hesitated before looking at Sam with a vulnerable expression that made the former want to hug him tight enough to chase his fears away. Instead he clears his throat and says _

_“You’re going to be fine. I can promise you that as long as I am alive you will always get home to your boy, Cap. We are brothers on the field but brothers off field too and there is no one else I would rather protect than you. Not like it will be any different than backing you in a bar brawl right?” Sam smirked trying to lighten up the mood but then he gave a small smile, putting an arm around Steve’s broad shoulders._

_“Yes our job is dangerous and there are so many factors that are out of our control. But you have a team that would do anything for you, you have a boy back home who loves you more than anything and you have a wedding to get back for. We’ll make it there okay?” _

_A sound that sounds a lot like a sniffle leaves Steve’s mouth and Sam just pulled him closer so that his head was on his shoulder. The area around them is silent until Steve breaks it. _

_“Hey Sam? If Bucky says yes, will you be my best man?”_

_“**When **Bucky says yes, I’d be honoured.”_

The door opened and Bucky fell to his knees to hug his husband’s best friend, holding onto him tightly as they both cried into each other’s necks. Bucky sniffled and let out soft whimpers and Sam tightened his hold on the slimmer man, rubbing his back in slow circles. If Steve could see them now he would be at his happiest since there was usually never a moment where they didn’t snap at each other or argue. But right now they were broken and sought comfort in the only other person who was feeling the loss as deeply.

“I’m so sorry I was supposed to protect him for you.” Sam cries against Bucky’s shoulder and the latter pulls Sam back and wipes his tears away with a stern expression. His eyes held the familiar defiance they always did when he disagreed with something and he spoke vehemently.

“You did the best you could, we both know Steve is a self-sacrificing idiot. Don’t you dare blame yourself birdbrain, I’ll hurt you if you do it again.”

Sam sniffled and looked into Bucky’s stormy grey eyes and for the billionth time understood just why Steve chose Bucky as a life partner. The man was almost as selfless and courageous as Steve himself. Even when breaking Bucky is comforting Sam, which ordinary person does that? He clung to Bucky a little longer, sniffling against his shirt as Bucky closed his eyes and cried quietly.

“He loves you and Peter more than anything, you know that right? Please tell me you know that?” Sam lifted his head to look at Bucky pleadingly and Bucky gave him a watery smile. Nodding solemnly he wiped his tears away with a flick of his hand and inhaled a deep breath.

“I can’t doubt Steve’s love and I never will either. He loves completely or not at all and I know he loved me and our son. But he also loves you, Sam.” Bucky wiped Sam’s tears from his cheeks and tutted softly when Sam looked down again. “He loves you Samuel, you’re his family just like me and Pete so don’t think any different. Family isn’t just blood, family is those who stuck around and never left. Those who love you unconditionally and support whatever you do. You have always supported his decisions even when you didn’t agree. You’re his family and unknowingly you became my family too. We love you okay? We don’t blame you for this so stop blaming yourself please?”

Sam nodded slowly almost as though he was in shock, he launched himself at Bucky and hugged him tightly. “You’re my family too, the three of you.”

Bucky smiled at him and opened his mouth to speak when he heard his son babbling for him and decided to get up instead. He hadn’t seen Peter because the little one didn’t deserve to see his father in grief, but Bucky cursed at himself inwardly because seeing Bucky sad was better than not seeing him at all. He all but ran to his living room where Natasha was pacing back and forth with Peter in her arms, his lips quivering as he tried not to cry. Bucky’s heart broke as his baby cried out for him as soon as he saw him, whimpering and extending his little arms.

He swept his son up and curled him against his chest, pressing multiple kisses to the soft brown locks on Peter’s head. In a hushed voice he whispered soft words of love to the little one, rocking back and forth on the heels of his feet as he kept Peter as close as possible. He looked up at Natasha as Peter’s eyes closed almost immediately, a small hand fisting Bucky’s shirt as though he was trying to stop his Papa from leaving him again.

“Thank you for looking after him, I shouldn’t have just left him to you like that.”

Bucky clearly looked as guilty as he felt as the terrifying women gave him a soft smile and placed a warm hand on his shoulder. Natasha spoke in a hushed voice and her eyes conveyed sorrow that she would never put into words.

“There’s nothing to thank me for, looking after Peter would never be a burden. Also you needed some time to yourself which is understandable.”

Bucky clung to his little lifeline a bit tighter and smiled a tight smile to convey his gratitude before whisking Peter off to his nursery. He set him down gently and placed a soft kiss on his forehead before leaving the room, the baby monitor switched on automatically.

“So what are the army doing about finding him?”

Natasha and Sam both looked at Bucky in shock and concern, looking hesitant as Sam spoke.

“Bucky, he’s missing in action. They’re not trying to do much.”

Bucky’s eyes steeled over with fierce determination as he sat down and pulled his phone out, pulling up the number of his best friend with a certain flair about him. He looked over at Sam and Natasha as they analysed him as though they were scientists and he was a lab rat. Quirking his brow questioningly he pressed the screen to dial the number and waited for what must have been a few seconds as the line picked up.

“Hello?”

A gruff voice answered with metallic clanging in the background, an automated British voice giving commands in the background and Bucky couldn’t help but smile softly.

“Hey Tony, get Rhodey on a conference call. I have a mission and we need all of the big guns for this.”

“JARVIS do what Buckaroo said and patch honey bear through!”

“Of course sir.”

A few seconds later another gruff voice was patched through, this one a lot more tired and deeper but still warm at the mention of Bucky.

“Barnes, what can we do for you?”

“Yeah bucking bronco, what’s the deal?”

Bucky set his mouth in a firm line and responded with pone short statement that stunned the others into shock. The phone line was silent until a row of barking commands started, and everyone jumped into action because no one dared to not listen.

“My husband is missing in action and we are going to do everything in our power that we can do to get him back to me and our son. Use all of your resources boys because we are bringing Captain Rogers home.”


	3. Stand By You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some sweet stevenat content and horrific information is uncovered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! 
> 
> Sorry i know it has been a while since I've updated but now that there's a pandemic going on I might as well update my story with all of the good stuff!
> 
> The format is based off my favourite series on here by @jay_girl88 called 'Mother Material' it's a stony fic and honestly i highly recommend it, I've reread it about 20 times it's amazing!
> 
> This chapter has so much fluff but then the angst is real at the end. 
> 
> As per usual you can get in contact with me on twitter @imarevenger and let me know any ideas you have!
> 
> Enjoy!

“Bucky. I’ve got the coordinates of where his tracker last placed him. It’s between these two points here, we assume that the satellite cut out, but we can never be too sure.” Natasha handed Bucky the documents with a small grimace of a smile at the gratitude gleaming from his face. The dimmed laptop screen in front of the man pinged with a new incoming message from Tony that had his attention immediately. Peter was cradled against his chest making it awkward to type, the sling not helping with his bad back that he often complained about. Natasha tapped his shoulder gently and gestured at the sniffling baby with a fond gleam in her eyes.

“I can take him to bed for you if that helps?”

Bucky looked down at his bundle of joy with furrowed brows and then nodded, placing a soft kiss on Peter’s forehead before handing him over. She took him out of the sling and propped his head against her shoulder, walking over to his room with the grace of a ballerina. Soft sunshine light illuminated the small, yet cosy room and Natasha remembered what a pain it was for Steve to get the colour of the walls ‘just right’ in his words. She never quite understood what the big deal was since the baby wouldn’t even understand the difference between daffodil and mango yellow but if it meant something to Steve it meant something to her.

Admittedly, the pair did an amazing job with the room. They decided on a honey yellow for the walls, a small lilac bookshelf beside Peter’s pastel blue crib filled with illustrated children’s books. They went overboard with the toys or maybe that was courtesy of Steve’s squad, she had personally given Peter a crochet duck that is one of his favourite toys. A rocking chair was in the middle of the room that she knew Bucky often frequented hence his back pain. She settled into the uncomfortable chair with Peter and rocked him gently as she stared at the wall in front of her. Steve had painted a wildlife mural on the wall that he was insistent Peter would fall in love with and follow his old man’s love of art, Bucky found it sweet and Natasha found it confusing. She still remembers the conversation she had with Steve whilst he was painting the wall.

\----

_“Look alive soldier!” Natasha flung the sandwich bag over to Steve, hitting the back of his head with sniper like precision. She smirked as Steve pouted at her, ruffling his silky hair as she settled down next to him and looked up at the wall with him. “It’s coming along great, a lot of random animals though don’t you think?”_

_Steve shook his head as he took a big bite of his sandwich. Natasha grimacing as mustard dripped down his chin and flung a napkin at his face. He laughed and accepted it, wiping his face and stretching out as though he had been there for hours, knowing Steve there was an extremely high chance of that being true. “Every single animal on here is important, plus Peter has got to know his family from the get-go right?”_

_She quirked an eyebrow as she ate her chips, tilting her head and looking at the wall again. “In case I’ve completely missed something out I’m sure peter isn’t related to wild animals, Steven.” He rolled his eyes good naturedly at her, leaning over until his head was on her shoulder and they both looked at the mural together. She laid her head on top of his and released the tension in her shoulders after smelling his familiar coconut shampoo, he insists that it belongs to Bucky, but she knows that Steve wears it religiously even when they’re away on deployment because it reminds him of his man. _

_“For someone who thinks she is so sharp minded you can be really dense sometimes, Nat.” Steve murmured softly under his breath, but she still heard it, her back went rigid and her mouth twisted into a scowl as she stared harder at the wall. She was missing something, but she couldn’t see it, she huffed softly and shrugged the shoulder Steve was on to jostle him. “Instead of being a smart ass how about you tell me what I’m missing?”_

_The weight of his head lifted off her shoulder as he pinched her nose gently before getting slapped away and grinned softly, turning towards the wall again. “It’s all of us, or at least the animals who symbolise the qualities we have.”_

_Natasha’s eyes followed his finger as he spoke. “See those two penguins with the baby penguin? That’s me, Buck and Petey. I picked penguins because the mother leaves her unborn child with the father to nourish and raise until she gets back from hunting. Now I know Leila isn’t temporarily leaving Peter with us, but we are going to love him with everything we’ve got. He’s our little penguin after all. “Steve had an extremely fond look on his face, his shoulders lax and eyes bright which they never were abroad. He continued to explain each animal and the connection to the family, _

_Tony is a dolphin because he is smart and somehow always lands up wherever they are, that fits. Sam is a gorilla, stoic but caring and protective when it comes down to it. Rhodes is a killer whale because there had to be another sea animal to keep Tony in check but also even when he is busy he always finds time for his family. Clint is a chimpanzee because he is the goofiest yet clings to everyone as though he is nothing without them. _

_“And that just leaves you doesn’t it? Well here you are!” His finger stops at a glorious grey wolf which stood in front of the penguin family, watching at a careful distance but watching, nonetheless. Natasha’s mouth was suddenly dry, and she turned to look at Steve in confusion, the other animals all made sense but this one? Steve continued on without turning to look at her, his voice starting light and happy but descending into a choked whisper. _

_“When we first met in the barracks you called yourself a lone wolf, saying that you only depended on yourself and that it is all you know how to do. ‘I don’t have family, I only have me’ you said, well you were wrong weren’t ya?” he chuckled quietly under his breath and inhaled a deep breath, as though he needed to muster the courage to carry on. “March 19th, we were in the middle of a battle and the enemy threw a grenade over the trenches and it landed right at my feet. I had just found out from Bucky that the artificial insemination worked, and we would be fathers so I was out of it but you weren’t, huh Nat?”_

_A traitorous tear slipped when she blinked, her breath hitching as she reached forward and gripped Steve’s hand as he continued the story, his own breathing irregular as he sniffled. He chose to loop up at the ceiling and shook his head at the memory he was reliving in his mind. “You screamed my name and pushed me out of the way, landing on top of the grenade just waiting for it to go off. I thank God everyday that it was a dud because I knew that I would never be able to raise my family without you in my life.” Natasha reached her hand up to cup his cheek and he leaned his face into it, placing his hand on top of hers as he spoke. “You were ready to die for me that day, Natasha. And all you said after I stopped screaming at you for recklessness is that you would do it all over again if it meant that I could go home to my family in one piece.”_

_She remembered how frantic he was, the grip on her arms that day was astonishingly tight as he shook her repeatedly before finally hugging her to his chest. He called her his sister that day and it was also the day that she realised whether she knew it or not she now had a family that she would die to protect. Natasha thought she would feel fear, amazement or hatred at finding something that made her weak but all she felt was the feeling of being home._

_“The lone wolf found her pack that day and I knew that nothing would stop you from protecting your pack. It makes sense that Peter’s godmother should be a wolf, after all who else would jump on a grenade for him apart from his daddy and papa penguin?” He had said it with a laugh, but his eyes held hope and pleaded with her to accept the proposal and for the first time in her life Natasha Romanov was truly speechless. Steve knew how much blood was on her hands and that she had no one yet gave her this family that taught her how to love. _

_The familiar click of the front door sounded, and Bucky whistled a soft tune, shouting out into the quiet house. “Hey guys, you done yet? I want to go through Disney movies and see which morals I want Peter to learn from them. Just warning you, I plan to sing along to every single song so no complaining!” _

_Steve squeezed her hand and pulled it off his cheek, setting it down as he got up his feet and walked towards the door, ready to walk out until. _

_“Steve?” _

_He turned and looked into her bright eyes, an inquisitive expression on his face as he tilted his head like a dopey Labrador. She wiped her cheeks and stood to join him, straightening her back and giving a mock army salute with a genuine smile. _

_“I won’t let you down.” _

_Steve chuckled and leaned down, kissing her forehead gently as he injected as much warmth as possible into his voice. _

_“You never have.”_

\----

Peter sleepily sniffled against her neck and broke her out of her memories. She inhaled a deep breath to ground herself before carding her fingers through the sweet boy’s short hair. She managed to keep her promise to Steve so far, always standing loyal to her family but now she had to do more than that. She had to fight to bring her friend home to his family and mark her words she will. She spoke softly into the air, her eyes transfixed on the innocent ray of sunshine on her chest and smiled.

“Don’t worry Peter, I’m going to bring your dad home even if it’s the last thing I do.

\----

Outside in the living room Bucky was frantically typing, his computer programming degree coming in useful as he worked with Tony to hack into the security cameras around the location Natasha had pinpointed. He inhaled a deep breath and pressed enter, fist bumping Sam and whopping when he got in.

“Tony, can you blow up the video and try to maximise the audio? See if we can hear anything?” He bit his bottom lip and harshly chewed on it as he heard a few clicks from the open Skype tab, Tony’s shallow cursing being the only indicator that he was throwing everything he could at the firewalls put up, Bucky may have managed to access the cameras but that was only live footage, they needed access to past footage.

“Bucky? I can’t” Tony’s voice came tentatively through their call, Bucky prepared himself for defeat and sighed softly. “It’s okay Tony, we can try other ways to track, Steve. No point slamming our heads against a wall.” He put his head in his hands and closed his eyes, mind already working in overdrive to find another way to track Steve when he was pulled out of his thoughts.

“No Buckaroo, I’ve got the video, the audio too but” Tony hesitated and grimaced, looking at how wrecked his friend looked through the camera and shook his head. “you shouldn’t see this”. Bucky lifted his head up and looked at the screen, his eyes softening because he knew how hard Tony fought to protect him, but he had to do this, this was for Steve and for him he would do anything.

“Tony, I appreciate you looking out for me, but I have to. I need to find him.” The genius gave him a grimace before typing on his on keyboard, a video file opening up on Bucky’s screen and it was as though all of the oxygen in the room had disappeared.

Bucky watched as his husband stealthily walked down the barely lit path, his gun held up and ready to attack but he didn’t see the person who was following him. The man who came out of nowhere and hit the back of Steve’s head with the barrel of his gun, a choked sob escaping Bucky’s mouth as his husband fell and the man kicked his head with the tip of his boot. Sam wrapped his arms around Bucky and Natasha came into the room with an eagle-eyed focus of where the source of trouble was coming from. Her eyes dulled as she saw the screen, Sam grinded his teeth together and Bucky hyperventilated as Steve was lifted into a car.

The unknown man finally scoped his surroundings and caught sight of the camera; he aimed his gun with his face clearly in view. The last thing they heard was the sound of a bullet and the screen went black.


End file.
